Do you have a child that says “I can’t” to learning or other tasks?
I think that just about every child goes through a time when they doubt themselves and their abilities. It’s a trial they must go through in order to learn how to say “I can” to difficult tasks.
Fortunately, there are some things you can do to help a child overcome the doubts so that he can start to believe in himself. Here’s what they are.
Solutions to “I Can’t”
Here are some methods for helping children get rid of the “I can’t.”
Consider the Causes
Why do children say, “I can’t?” Is it laziness? Well, maybe. But first, you should consider these potential causes.
Cause #1: A lack of understanding
When it comes to learning, if the material doesn’t make sense to the child, he’ll try to avoid doing the work.
The solution
Explore different ways of teaching the concept. Try relating it to something he is familiar with or use a hands-on approach.
Cause #2: A fear of failure
Some children are afraid of making mistakes. Instead of taking risks, they prefer to stay in their comfort zone and avoid doing tasks that they could potentially fail at.
The solution
Tell the child that it’s okay to make mistakes. Mistakes are really tools for learning.
Cause #3: A lack of confidence If a child has experienced failure many times, he could potentially start to believe that he really can’t do the task required of him.
The solution
Let the child know that sometimes we have to fail to succeed. Edison made 1000 attempts before he successfully invented the light bulb. Also explain to him that with practice and study, the task can become easier.
Throw Away the “I Can’t”
One way to get rid of an “I can’t” is to destroy it, literally. Here’s how.
Tell your child to write down “I can’t…” on a small piece of paper and finish the sentence with whatever it is he feels he can’t do. It could look like this, “I can’t learn fractions.” or “I can’t write a paragraph.”
Next, have him tear the paper to shreds and throw it in the trash. Let him have fun with this and get as excited about it as he likes.
Last, tell him to write out a new, affirmative sentence on a piece of paper. This one should replace the “can’t” with a “can.” For example, “I can learn fractions” or “I can write a paragraph.” If he likes, he can draw a smiley face, a star, or some other positive picture on the paper. Hang this note up where he can see it on a regular basis. It will remind him that he CAN do the difficult task.
Hang Up Inspirational Quotes
Sometimes it’s helpful to have a little visual inspiration. Fortunately, there are plenty of quotes by famous people that you can find on posters or write on a piece of paper to hang up on your walls. Here are some you might be interested in.
“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right.” — Henry Ford
“I don’t think anything is unrealistic if you believe you can do it.” — Richard L. Evans
“I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I can’t accept not trying.” — Michael Jordan
“The mind is the limit. As long as the mind can envision the fact that you can do something, you can do it, as long as you really believe 100 percent.” — Arnold Schwarzenegger
“When you are asked if you can do a job, tell ’em, ‘Certainly I can!’ Then get busy and find out how to do it.” — Theodore Roosevelt
“It always seems impossible until it’s done.” — Nelson Mandela
“It’s always too early to quit.” — Norman Vincent Peale
“Believe you can and you’re halfway there.” — Theodore Roosevelt
“If you can dream it, you can do it.” — Walt Disney
“The word impossible is not in my dictionary.” — Napoleon Bonaparte
“If you think you can do it, you can.” — John Burroughs
“I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; and because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do something that I can do.” — Helen Keller
“I do the very best I know how – the very best I can; and I mean to keep on doing so until the end.” — Abraham Lincoln
“You must first clearly see a thing in your mind before you can do it.” — Alex Morrison
“If you do not believe you can do it then you have no chance at all.” — Arsene Wenger
“You can do anything if you have enthusiasm.” — Henry Ford
“Sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” — Lewis Carroll
“You can do what you have to do, and sometimes you can do it even better than you think you can.” — Jimmy Carter
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. — Philippians 4:13
Quotes like these are wonderful tools for training young minds.
By the way, that last quote in the list is in the Christian Motivational Posters KJV along with some other inspirational Bible verses. You might want to check it out!
I hope these tips helped you out. If you found them useful, please share them with others. Let’s get rid of the “I can’ts” in this world.